How To Discuss Having a Vasectomy With Your Partner

Although Australia has one of the highest vasectomy rates in the world – one in four men over the age of 40 has had one – it still remains a taboo subject for many couples. So this is a touchy topic that may benefit from a bit of consideration before tackling it.

To begin, it may be helpful to understand the facts surrounding the vasectomy procedure so that you and your partner begin from a common point of understanding, which should make the conversation go a bit more smoothly.

Vasectomy Facts

• The way that vasectomies prevent pregnancy is by blocking a structure known as the vasa deferentia, which prevents the transportation of sperm from the testicles to the urethra.

• Most vasectomies are performed under local anaesthetic at a urologist’s office. Your urologist will inform you if you require additional sedation or hospitalisation, depending upon your medical history.

• You will need to avoid vigorous physical and sexual activity during your recovery. You will be provided with specific recommendations, like minimising swelling and discomfort by placing a cold pack on the scrotum, as well as wearing some type of undergarment support.

• Most people who have had a vasectomy can resume their work schedule a day after their procedure.

• You should be able to return to normal sexual activity within around one week after your procedure.

Vasectomies are not immediately reliable to prevent birth control. You must submit a semen analysis to guarantee that no sperm will be ejaculated after your vasectomy. Urologists typically advise patients to wait at least three months before submitting a semen analysis. Use an alternate contraceptive until then.

Here are a few tips to help you have that conversation about getting a vasectomy:

Be well informed

It is a good idea to be as well educated on the procedure, the risks and benefits, prior to commencing any discussion.  You can download our free Vasectomy Guide here.

Set a Date

Setting a day to sit down and talk about getting a vasectomy is preferable to just suddenly bring it up randomly. If you’re the partner of someone who may be getting a vasectomy, you may want to wait until your partner is in a good and receptive mood before bringing it up. For example, it’s probably not a good idea to start the conversation when he has just gotten home from work, as he may be stressed and unreceptive.  Find a time when you both can be more comfortable and relaxed, without distractions.

Listen

Keep in mind that this is a conversation that should involve some give-and-take. The procedure will affect both partners, so each partner should carefully consider the thoughts and input that they are hearing.

Limit Expectations

Have realistic expectations. Most people do not suddenly agree to make major changes in their lives, particularly those that involve surgery and permanent reproductive changes. Just present the idea and go over the benefits without going into too many details.

Once you and your partner have had that initial conversation, resist bringing it up randomly in the future. Give them some breathing room to consider it on their own terms without constantly getting in their face about it. When you do sit down to discuss it, make sure that you set aside a time when you’re both relaxed and can focus.

Dr Michael Read welcomes the opportunity to discuss the procedure with both partners so that you are both appropriately educated to make an informed decision.  To book a consultation, call us on (07) 5531 3205 or use the form on this page.